Everything parents need to know about this disturbing trend
As summer begins to wind down, it’s common to hear about all things back to school neckless. Shopping is an activity that is common to hear about right now – after all, going to the store for new school clothes and accessories is exciting for both children and parents.
But if you hear students discussing back-to-school necklesss, it’s important to remember that they’re not talking about a new, cute piece of jewelry. Instead, it’s a tricky phrase (that doesn’t seem dangerous on the surface) you might hear in conversation or see on social media. So what exactly is a back-to-school loser? We explain.
What is a “back to school neckless”?
At Urban Dictionary, back-to-school is defined as “another name for the nose. It’s because of your utter dismay when you realize school has started again.”
The use of this phrase includes: “I’m going to buy my school backpack,” “I can’t wait to get my school backpack,” and “Thinking about getting this school backpack.” “My school backpack has called to me,” “I can’t wait to use it,” etc.
So, although Hari back from school seems innocent enough to those who are unaware of its true meaning, it is actually a cry for help as it is code for death.It is easier for parents to assist their children once they are educated on this term.
How should parents talk about this trendy back-to-school neckless phrase with their kids?
If you’re not sure how to talk about it, Samantha Westhouse, LLMSW, a psychotherapist and maternal child health social worker, suggests letting your child lead the conversation. “I heard about this thing called back-to-school horns – do you know anything about it?” she suggests. It’s always important to avoid judgment when communicating with your child so they feel comfortable sharing how they feel.
Just trying to check can go a long way. “Emily Caleri, LLMSW, believes parents must feel empowered to speak to their children about mental health. Regarding back-to-school conversations, she adds, “Share personal stories about how you felt about starting school each year, especially if you felt intimidated as a child.” Let them know if you can help them with anything they need or have. Their professional help.
Why is there so much fear as students begin school?
Some concerns are understandable as students are expected to adjust to the new normal after the summer months. Several factors make returning to school overwhelming, explains Cavaliere. Changing schools, teachers, schedules, etc. can be overwhelming for some students. They go from sleep and rest schedules to early mornings and busy days.”
And oftentimes, these struggles feel unbearable for students. Finally, the CDC has revealed, “More than 1 in 3 high school students experienced persistent feelings of sadness or hopelessness in 2019, a 40 percent increase from 2009.”
According to Westhouse, it could be a combination of the way socialization has taken place over the last few years.”It’s hard to imagine that 13-year-olds were 10 when we were all in lockdown. [They] were doing school practically and missing out on regular clubs, sports and socialization. Add to that the mass school shooting and what we have experienced. In the last few years in our world, it affects everything.
Are there some warning signs parents should look for?
“If someone uses that phrase, there’s a good chance they’re struggling with their mental health,” says Cavalieri. Whether your child is seriously considering suicide or uses this phrase to seek help, you will find that spending time alone, acting, and picking up things, is easy and repetitive.Crying, sleeping more than usual, difficulty sleeping, insomnia. Interest in things they enjoyed, giving stuff, and overall, a change in behavior.”
Even if you haven’t heard your child use this phrase, it’s probably a phrase they use on their phone, Cavaleri points out. “Text messages or social media can be used,” she says. From toddlers to teenagers, parents should keep an eye on their children’s electronic use. Students of any age may be using this phrase and feeling it, so keep an eye out for signs in your children.
What should students know about using or hearing the phrase “back-to-school neckless” with friends?
“I warn students that using this phrase is very serious,” Cavaleri said. If they really have these feelings, they should not feel ashamed and should seek help. Their friend told them no.
It’s important for your child or teen to know that even if they think it’s a joke, it’s a serious matter. I would encourage your child to Educate and if they notice their friends using the phrase to address it to school staff.
What resources have been suggested to help children and youth who are considering returning to school?
Parents can be the first line of support for their children. The CDC recommends that parents “supervise their teens to help them make healthy decisions,” “spend time with their teens enjoying shared activities,” and get involved with school by volunteering or tutoring. and communicating regularly with administrators.
West House will also advocate for schools to establish policies to support students. According to the CDC, “Almost one in six teenagers planned to commit suicide in the past year. A 44 percent increase from 2009.”
To help your child feel less anxious about going back to school neckless, Kelly recommends preparing for school early by “getting organized, visiting the school/walking [their] schedule allows, sleeping and eating healthy.” “
Ultimately, knowledge is power, and knowing that this is a problem. That affects many children and young people means that parents can gain more awareness and get additional support. Westhouse and Cavalieri both recommend seeking treatment as well as using the new 988 suicide helpline if needed.